Monday, June 21, 2010

Happy (Belated) Fathers' Day

Happy (Belated) Fathers' Day to all of the fathers out there. Well, ok, maybe not all of the fathers. To all fathers who are present, and don't beat their children or wives (or other forms of physical abuse), or emotionally abuse them, and don't waste the family money on beer in favor of, you know, food....Maybe we should rename it You're-Not-a-Shitheel-Father Day.

Good Dad...
This is not some anti-father post. My father is wonderful. I'm a father and I'm wonderful. What? No, you can trust me. *Big Grin*

After all, the same conditions can apply to mothers on Mothers' Day. There aren't that many holidays where it becomes that individually subjective. If you believe in Jesus, you celebrate Christmas. Hell, you don't even have to believe in Capital J to celebrate, but the post about changing Christmas to Commercialmas for a more honest and all inclusive holiday is out of season right now.

On Arbor Day we don't say, "Here's to all the trees, except those fuckers who fell on my powerlines and made me miss the last period of the NBA Championship game."

On Labor Day we don't say, "Here's to all them laborers, except the ones who called in sick when it was just a hangover."

And on Veteran's Day we don't say, "Here's to all the Veteran soliders, except those from Abu Ghraib."

And I don't think we should.

Bad Dad...
But Fathers' Day? I think we should. In fact, I think we should have a dual holiday on the third Sunday of June...You can either celebrate Fathers' Day, or Fuck-You-Father's Day. And yes, the difference in apostrophe is intentional.

That way, most of us who love our fathers can maintain the status quo, but people whose fathers were real shitheels (not assholes....asshole is a term of honor on this blog), then here's the day to honor your hurt, angry, resentful feelings. (And yes, the same should be done for mothers, but come on, maintain focus, it's the day after Fathers' Day).

Speaking of maintaining focus, on a side note, I'm proud to say that my Father's Day was spent sleeping on the couch in my underwear with a beer in hand, the natural state of fathers everywhere. Vive la Fathair...! (French, naturally, for Live Father!)

I had meant to share my ideas for a new holiday, but my brain had other things on its mind, so I'll return tomorrow for to tell about my completely new holiday inspired by Fathers' Day.


At 4:53 PM, Blogger Mrs. Chili said...

DUDE! Wherever have you BEEN!? I've MISSED you!

Sign me up for your alternate holiday! In fact, sign me up for both the Father's AND Mother's version, please...

At 1:18 PM, Anonymous parent and teacher said...

bad dad is dad who always shouts and get angry to his child. good dad is cool and caring dad. father's day is great day for dads. ice breaking activities


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